March Update

It may appear like Arthur and I decided to give up blogging for Lent since it has been a few weeks since our last post.  We didn't.  We just let a few weeks pass without realizing it.  I often wonder how entire weeks slip by without us realizing it.  Our time has been split between a few different activities lately.  We finally got our bikes out on the road after months of pedaling in the basement.  This was wonderful.  Arthur even got to pull out his bike repair skills to fix the brakes on my bike after I road 10 miles with the brake pad rubbing my tire-- hopefully this is the reason I couldn't keep up with Arthur on his speedy new bike.  We have also been watching a new TV series on Netflix--  Alaksa: The Last Frontier.  This series is about an extended family of subsistence homesteaders in Alaska.  It is a mix of the survival shows we like, the environmental documentaries Arthur enjoys, and Alaskan scenery for me.  I have frankly been very glad some evenings that Arthur doesn't haul me out in the dead of winter on a 40 mile snow mobile trek to go ice fishing.  This makes grocery shopping look a little better.  Arthur has also been getting his basketball fix with watching the San Antonio Spurs play a few evenings and going to the state basketball tournament to see my high school alma mater defend their title.  I spent the weekend hanging out with friends from college.  We went on a picnic and hit the driving range.  I was informed by two of my friends who play golf that me swing needs some major work.  As Twain says, "Golf is a good walk spoiled" so I am not going to get too concerned.  Hopefully the upcoming weeks will include more of the same- biking, Alaska TV shows, basketball, and friends.  It could possibly be awhile before another post since we have so much going on.  Omnia Vincit Amor.

Gathering around the table

Recently one of our weekends was full of the noise from drills, saws, and orbital sanders as well as what seemed like about a million pounds of saw dust in the air.  All of my (Alex's) family had gotten together for the weekend to do woodworking projects-- a perfectly normal, "relaxing" weekend gather.  Each of my siblings and their significant others were building a rustic farmhouse style table.  My sister-in-law and my dad had researched plans and styles as well as ordering that materials.  The rest of us showed up with our skills.  I think most participants would agree that the skills brought to the "table" were limited.  My dad and younger brother have been doing woodworking together for years and have built some awesome creations.  I can sand and Arthur built a few projects in shop class in junior high but that is the extent of our experience.

We all gathered in the garage Saturday morning after my dad had to drag us away from breakfast and some lively conversation to get to work.  I spent most of the day sanding with the other gals while Arthur spent sometime using a jig to drill holes and screw the table tops together.  While I don't understand much about woodworking I have always had an appreciation for the amount of planning and detail it takes.  It seems like it is pretty difficult to fix mistakes in woodworking and you can't deviate much from a plan.

Throughout the day there were times when those of us who were less skillful didn't have much to do in the shop.  This meant we got a chance to play with our niece and read books with her.  That evening my mom prepared a "Tropics Day" dinner.  Several years we went to Florida on Spring Break and the years we didn't go we would eat foods like jambalaya, shrimp and steak (or "surf and turf") tropical fruits, and key lime pie which was all on the menu for that evening.  After dinner we went back out to finish the assembly of the first table.  It was exciting to see how all the parts fit together for the finished product.  Of course there is still a lot of sanding and staining to do on that table.  We will have to "table" the work on the other two for another weekend until we get more wood.  My parents may have a few huge tables in their garage for months.

During that weekend for one of the meals we deviated from my family's usual blessing to a prayer that Arthur and my brothers said at their fraternity for meals:

"Be present at our table Lord

Be here and everywhere adored

These mercies bless and pray that we

May live in paradise with thee." 

What a blessing for our weekend of "gathering around the table".  As we were building the tables it was interesting to think about the gatherings that will happen around the three tables in the years to come.  There will probably be some gatherings of our family but then friends, small groups from church, neighbors, strangers, etc.  So much life is often shared sitting around a table sharing a meal.  And in all of that we ask that the Lord be present at our tables.  Omnia Vincit Amor.

Goodbye February, Hello March

Yet another week has come and gone.  It doesn't feel like anything huge happened this week.  I (Alex) did officially decide on Tuesday that I am tired of winter so if it could be on its merry little way that would be wonderful.  I just want to get outside again.  Back in August I posted about the color of caterpillars predicting the weather. I saw these caterpillars while running.  One was dark and furry indicating a cold, snowy winter and the other was black with tinges of orange showing a cold winter with some mild weather mixed in.  I'm not sure which was right.  It has been very cold and quite a bit of snow but there are also been a handful of days that have been very pleasant.  So much for winter and caterpillars.  Of course we were hit some by winter weather again this weekend and I am snuggled up on the couch writing this with a sweater, jacket, and a cozy blanket-- I'm tired of being cold.  We are now also in the transition from the Winter Olympics in February to March Madness in a few weeks.  A good friend and I were talking a few weeks ago how it seems we are always looking forward to something else instead of enjoying where we are at.  Even when we get to an event we have been looking forward we don't enjoy it but start thinking about what is next.  This past week I have been looking forward to spring to get outside but maybe I am missing some of the wonderful indoor moments from this past week.  So here is the recap of the week:

- Wednesday evening we were at Youth Group.  The topic was parents and parenting.  It was interesting to hear middle and high schoolers talk about what they think parents should or shouldn't do.  They were also asked what the hardest part about being a parent is.  Here were some of the answers: caring for children, disciplining children, listening to children, loving your children when they make bad choices.  I looked over at Arthur and told him the the common problem that makes parenting hard is "children".  We then decided that we want a dog.

- A few weeks ago I checked out a cookbook from the library.  I have spent the week cooking up some of the new recipes such as creamy spinach and tomato pasta, ham and swiss crustless quiche, honey wheat biscuits, and apple crumble.  Since I have been cooking every night there as been a lot more dishes for Arthur to wash-- He doesn't seem to mind as long as he gets to eat something a little different.  On my list of firsts in the kitchen this week: sauteing an onion, making biscuits from scratch, and cooking black beans.  The gal who wrote the cookbook originally started with a blog about cooking on a limited budget while still having dishes that were healthy and had some variety. If you're interested here is a link to the blog: www.budgetbytes.com.  

- Friday evening since we were stuck inside we played Settlers of Catan again.  Arthur proclaimed with in the first few minutes of the game that he was pretty sure he was going to win.  I agreed with him but continued to play and realized when he made a comment that he was 1 move from winning I could still possibly win too.  And I did.  He sat there and started at the board in disbelief for a while.  Is there any family out there that can actually play board games and everyone ends up having a good time?  I always play with people who are too competitive so games always end with some heated words or somebody upset.

- This weekend I had a continuing education conference at work on the lumbar spine.  (I am still probably not an expert on back pain and I probably don't know why your back might be hurting-- talk to me in 10 years and maybe I will be a little more confident).  It was my first conference as a real PT instead of a student.  It was suppose to be all day Saturday and Sunday but due to weather Sunday was canceled-- which meant I got part of a weekend.

- While I was sitting in class Arthur went to a library book sale.  Arthur loves books and especially book sales because then he can rescue books who are crying out for a good home.  I might have asked him not to bring too many crying books home since we only have so much room for biochemistry textbooks published in 1980.  Some of his finds include a book on logic, Whitman's Leaves of Grass (it is a "pretty" book so it will at least look good sitting on the bookshelf),  Bulfinches' Greek and Roman Mythology, A book by Winston Churchill on the Boer War, R.C. Sproul's Getting the Gospel and The Amateur Guide to Telescope Making.  He also got to spend time with his family too as they were traveling through the area.

Saturday evening we snuggled up on the couch while it was snowing outside to spend the evening reading together.  Maybe a few more weeks of cold weather won't be so bad.  Omni Vincit Amor.

Valentine's Day

This was our first Valentine's Day as a married couple.  On Friday evenings our plans changed and we ended up at home.  For some reason when I (Alex) want to celebrate I am always drawn to breakfast foods for dinner.  I don't know why.  We pulled out the chocolate peppermint waffle mix, made frozen fruit smoothies, and had fresh strawberry and pineapple.  Delish.  We settled in for another romantic evening watching the Olympics as Arthur snoozed in his recliner starting about 8pm after some early mornings at work.

Our activities on Saturday for this weekend of love included going to the library (we love books) as well as a trip to purchase a bike for Arthur (we love biking as well).  This is Arthur's first bike since he was a kid so we are excited to hit the roads and trails once the weather warms up.  Plus, if you couldn't already guess, watching more of the Olympics (we love sports).

That evening I made a special dinner for Arthur.  After all the way to a man's heart is through his stomach.  We had flat iron steak, baked potato with cheese and broccoli, corn bread, and fruit cups. We both dressed up to dine at our card table in the kitchen.  Afterwards we danced around the kitchen to some memorable  songs from our relationship.  And finally, the main moment was pulling out the cherry cheese cake I made for Arthur.  I then I realized I don't have a pie server so presentation left some to be desired since it ended up as a glob of cheesecake.  My husband doesn't like cherries though but he requested cherry cheesecake.  Being the dutiful wife I am, I separated all the cherries out of a can of cherry pie fill to use just the filling part to cover the pie.  Love makes you do crazy things sometimes.  Omnia Vincit Amor.

Armchair Olympians

It is Alex's opinion that the best thing about even number years is not elections but the Olympics.  We have been thoroughly enjoying watching the Winter Olympics.  Winter seems to drag by sometimes and if it must be cold and snowy at least the Olympics makes ice and snow exciting since we no longer get snow days.  In the evenings we curl up in our basement under blankets and watch in wonderment as athletes across the world compete.  The following are some of our thoughts on the Olympics:

- Competition is art.  What these athletes accomplish; honing their skills and their bodies to stretch the limits of human potential, is beautiful to watch and equal in every way to the more "high brow" art we tend call more intellectual.  If you can think of a competitive event as art, as winning or losing as something that brings context rather than an ultimate aim, watching becomes much more relaxed and allows you to appreciate the efforts of the team/person you aren't necessarily cheering for.

- Norway has quite the history at the winter Olympics.  Alex first fell in love with the Olympics in 1994 when they were held in Lillehammer.  She was very disappointed after the 2 weeks ended that they only show sports constantly for the Olympics every few years.  Two years seemed like a lifetime to wait for the magic of the Olympics to return.   Also, it is family lore that Alex has ancestors that were Norwegian vikings who got shipwrecked in Scotland or Ireland and just stayed there for several centuries until coming to the US.  She has always cheered for Norway.

- Norway is crazy about cross country skiing which is becoming one of our favorite sports to watch.  While this year they had some setbacks they are the top cross country skiing country.  One interesting fact that especially appeals to Alex with her background in sports science is that 5 of the top 7 best VO2max values recorded have been in Norwegian men.  (Background info:  VO2max is the measurement of aerobic fitness.  It is how well your body can take in and use oxygen.  This is the test where the participant wears a mask and runs on a treadmill as the speed and incline increases until they can't go any longer-- pretty brutal.)  Also of the top 15 values 8 compete in cross country skiing.  This is compared to ultramarathoners and bikers.  The highest value is a Norwegian cyclist at 97.5 ml/kg/min.  My estimated VO2max is about 43 which is pretty good for my age group.  To put it in perspective Lance Armstrong and Steve Prefontaine are both at 84 are 20, and 21 on this list, behind a boatful of Norwegians.

-Speaking of Scandinavian dominance, 3 of the top 5 countries in Olympic medals per capita are from the relatively sparsely populated peninsula.  Finland, in first place, has one Olympic medal for every 17,904 citizens.  While the United States has won the most total medals, it is 37th in per capita medals (one medal for every 130,521 citizens).  The U.S, due to its population, could not possibly match that pace.  It would take 17,503 medals and only 17,283 medals have ever been awarded.  There are some really interesting thoughts to be had about what those statistics have to say about culture, but we'll save those for another day.

-Sochi is a subtropical beach resort town roughly the same latitude as Atlanta.  If you want to read an interesting story about how they did that, click here.  As good as the organizers did "winterizing" Sochi, the snow conditions have invariably been slushy and that has had an adverse effect on multiple competitions, and it is speculated that the conditions are a major reason Norway was not is usual dominant self in cross country skiing.  As I currently understand it, the politics that led to Sochi being chosen is one of the few blemishes on these games.

-It is fascinating to me (Arthur) as an engineer to learn about the thought and effort that goes into the equipment these athletes use.  BMW designed the United States' bobsleds, espionage is a major concern for different country's luge sleds, there is speculation that the suits designed by UnderArmor for the U.S. speed skating team are to blame for their poor showing, and the superiority of the Finnish and German skies have been credited for their strong showing in cross country skiing (the poor Norwegians designed their skies for more frozen conditions).  

- At one time I (Alex) wasn't a huge figure skating fan.  I thought it was a little wimpy compared to speed skating, especially short track.  I have slowly gained more appreciation for what these athletes are capable of doing.  In pairs skating we were impressed when one group did a throw where the guy threw the gal about 5 feet in front of him and several feet up.  She did a quad toe loop in the air and landed it.  How does he throw someone 5 feet?  Arthur's a big guy but he didn't think he could toss me 5 feet (we didn't try this).  Also he is on ice, how does he not go backwards?  How does she spin 4 times without a push off? How in the world does she land on one blade?  It is my experience that most people struggle to stand on one leg for more than a few seconds let alone a single blade.  The spins figure skaters do is also some impressive physics.  It is a great way to see physics concepts in real life with centrifugal force in the spins and how center of mass affects speed and acceleration.

- Also ice skating is the only sport in which throwing items on the playing surface is allowable.  That would be major penalties and delays of game in any other sport.  

  

- Who thought skeleton was a good idea?  I understand the need for speed and thrill seeking.  Isn't that what bobsled and luge are for?  Is it smart or safe to go careening down a chute of ice at 80 mph experiencings 5 Gs of force with your chin inches from the ice and your head as the first thing that is going to hit anything in your path?  These athletes have guts.  It would be interesting to see if skeleton athletes grew up as "emergency room" children. 

- The Super Bowl is known for its commercials but the Olympics has them beat hands down.  Of course what could be better than a 30 seconds inspirational sports movie as a commercial?  We will even admit that we got a little misty-eyed watching a few of them.   

Maybe next week we will resume normal life but the we will eagerly await the next presidential election year since that means the Summer Olympics in Rio.  Omnia Vincit Amor. 

Chaperones

Right now Arthur and I are curled up in the basement watching the Olympics.  It is such a relaxing and restful evening.  Which we desperately needed.  We just spent 36 hours with a group of middle school and high school students, and survived relatively unscathed.

Friday afternoon Arthur and I got off work early to go with the youth group to Kansas City to a youth conference called Acquire the Fire.  I was assigned to the 15 passenger van with the high school girls.  Myself and the other female sponsor decided we didn't really want to drive.  I was able to sweet talk my loving husband into switching to our van to drive.  Arthur was excited to get the opportunity to drive such a massive vehicle around (I don't even like driving my little car around downtown KC), however it meant extended time with the segment of the population that tends to make Arthur cringe-- high school girls.  After a quick safety check of mirrors, controls, etc., we cruised down the interstate with Arthur at the helm and myself as his trusted co-pilot for navigation and crowd control.

Here's our selfie from the conference.

The conference was Friday evening and all day Saturday with 2,000 teenagers from around the region.  There was a worship band, a few mini concerts by other bands, messages, and drama presentations.  It was all geared towards teenagers-- fast paced, lots of action.  Someone had tipped me off that it was going to be loud and recommended taking ear plugs-- I am glad I did.  My ears are not as young as they used to be and I work with enough patients who have difficulty hearing I will try to protect mine.  There was a lot of video graphics and lighting effects.   Sunglasses might not have been a bad idea either.  One thing that Arthur and I have talked about lately is different tastes in worship music.  It seems to be an issue which every church deals with to some extent and many even have different worship services because of different music preferences.  We attend the more traditional service at our church although we joke that most of it is actually worship music written in the 1980s and not necessarily hymns that are centuries old.  It seemed like most of the kids really enjoyed the music this weekend.  I think it is great reminder that worship isn't about the style of the music but the heart and the message of the lyrics.  It is my own opinion that harps might be a little tame for heaven and what we experience this weekend might be a good representation of worship in heaven.  I love Isaiah's vision in Isaiah 6.  Isaiah is in the Lord's throne room with seraphim all around saying:

“Holy, holy, holy is the Lord of hosts;

the whole earth is full of his glory!”

And the foundations of the thresholds shook at the voice of him who called, and the house was filled with smoke.

The foundations of the temple was shaking.  The room was filled with smoke.  Imagine that for a moment.  The Lord's throne room is not a place for tame worship.  This weekend there were times when you could feel the drums and the base throughout the auditorium.  I think the fog machine also filled the stage with smoke.  I, personally, am more of the "Be still and know that I am God" but I don't think it will be quiet when the mountains and rocks cry out in worship someday.

We spent the night at a church in Kansas City.  Nothing like sleeping on the floor in a room with 40 other people.  Once again the ear plugs came in handy.  We also both had sleeping pads and were so exhausted  that we slept great.  For about 4 and a half hours.  We did manage to get teenagers up on a Saturday morning and out the door by just after 7am.  After the morning session we went to Minsky's Pizza for lunch which was Arthur's highlight for the trip.  I also feel like I won some "cool" points by going with the high school girls to Starbucks. 

In one of the messages that I really liked the speaker talked about our legacies.  God uses us despite our backgrounds or qualifications, many times in spite of them.   We were asked to look at our hands and think about we can change the world or our corner of it.  In looking at my hands I saw a scar from running the zipline at camp in Alaska and all that I learned through those three months.  I saw the ring on my finger that my husband gave me last summer when we exchanged our wedding vows and thought about how I am so thankful and blessed that God gave me such a wonderful man but also considered how God will use our marriage and family for His kingdom.  My hands are small but I am told by many of my patients that they are strong.  Sometimes I am told I have magical fingers, or fingers of death depending on which therapeutic technique I am using at the time.  How do I use my hands to touch those who a hurting through my profession beyond their physical needs?  

After the conference we loaded everyone back up in the vans and tried to find our way out of downtown Kansas City late at night.  Does this sound familiar, like one of our recent posts?  We shared the story of our first date in Kansas City with some of the girls as we drove out of town.  Arthur showed his skills as a driver and did a great job.  On the way home the rest of the gang fell asleep but we kept ourselves awake with different mind challenges.  I lost a bet because I got the capital of Massachusetts wrong but Arthur doubted me that the 10th, 11th, and 12th presidents were Tyler, Polk, and Taylor.  If anyone had been awake and heard this conversation we may have lost some of our coolness.  We pulled into our driveway at about 1:30am and exhausted.  We didn't see the light of day until 10am the next morning.  Being teenagers again was exhausting.  Omni Vincit Amor.  

Filling the gaps

One of Arthur's favorite movies is Rocky.  So his favorite movie is actually Rocky IV (I should get wife points for knowing this specifically) but when we first started dating he was crazy about all the films in the Rocky Balboa saga.  I watched the original Rocky recently and it is slightly concerning how much I have mentioned it on the blog lately-- hopefully our readers will forgive this lack of refinement.  (Arthur's editorial comment:  Lack of refinement??  My dear Alex, Rocky won three Academy Awards, made the American Film Institute's list of top movies, and the cinematography continues to influence how movies are filmed to this day.  You don't have to speak with a British accent and wear a tuxedo to be high culture.)  The following is the dialogue between Rocky and his friend Paulie about Rocky dating Paulie's sister Adrian:

Paulie:  You like her?
Rocky: Sure, I like her.
Paulie: What's the attraction?
Rocky: I dunno... she fills gaps.
Paulie: What's 'gaps'?
Rocky: I dunno, she's got gaps, I got gaps, together we fill gaps.

My mother actually quoted these lines to me during a discussion about Arthur's and my relationship when we were getting more serious about each other.   I was quite surprised that my mom was giving relationship advice from Rocky but it's an idea that Arthur and I talk about frequently in our marriage.  We both bring certain personalities, skills, background, and experiences to the table-- both good and bad.  We also each have areas where we may lack certain skills or experiences and the other person "fills in these gaps"  The more scientific and technical term would be synergy.  Here's the definition of synergy from wikipedia:

Synergy is the interaction of multiple elements in a system to produce an effect different from or greater than the sum of their individual effects. The term synergy comes from a Greek word meaning "working together".

I would like to think that our relationship is more than just addition, 1+1=2, but more of a synergistic effect where 1+1= better than 2.  We are better together than individually.  This is true for many different realms of life.  In talking with someone about personal ministry one time I mentioned that if I was to marry, it would be less likely that I would pursue doing healthcare in developing nations which was a dream at that time.  I was under the impression that marriage and family would possibly decrease my ability to reach out to others.  (Please remember I was college, younger, and less wise than I hopefully am now.)  This friend then pointed out that if I was to get married my career path might look slightly different than becoming a physical therapist in some remote African village, it wouldn't necessarily hinder my impact for His kingdom.  They pointed out that many times in ministry 2 are better than 1 and the impact might be more than doubled.  And this is true in many other areas too.  I have always competed in individual sports and haven't really experienced personally the thrill of a team working together in athletic competitions.  I suppose marriage is the ultimate team sport.

In another blog we read often, The Art of Manliness, there was a post on marriage as a master mind.  The idea of a master mind is "when two or more people come together as a group with positive energy, a definite aim, and complete harmony, a "third mind" is essentially formed".  A committee working as a group as the power of multiple minds but in a close relationship with harmony a super power is formed.  This article talked about some famous couples such as Nobel prize winners, Pierre and Marie Curie, Johnny Cash and his wife June who won a few Grammy awards for their duets, and many other couples who have ran businesses together, writing books, etc.  I am personally thankful that Arthur and I are not business partners in a career  (although one of my goals in the 5th grade was to become an electrical engineer but now I am married to one).  I would like to think that we encourage one another in our individual pursuits and also share many mutual goals and interests.  The following quote is also from the post on master minds by a researcher studying self-expanision and growth in marriages:

“People have a fundamental motivation to improve the self and add to who they are as a person,” Dr. Lewandowski says. “If your partner is helping you become a better person, you become happier and more satisfied in the relationship.”

Some examples of self-expansion that have occurred in our relationship include:
-Arthur making me watch Net-flix documentaries on everything from origami to Steinway painos
-I once read all 1124 pages of Systematic Theology so I could understand what Arthur was rambling on about during our nightly phone conversations
- I am now occasionally aware of what is going on in politics today and the multiple sides of issues, once again due to Arthur's ramblings
- Arthur now eats spinach salad at basically every meal
- I now will eat Asian food
- Together we have pursued interests in sustainable living and renewable energy
- Arthur is becoming tidier and more organized
- Since Arthur lives with a physical therapist he is becoming more interested in making physical activity and fitness a part of his day.
- We both share a love for travel and the outdoors.  Since it is winter and neither of us has much vacation time we are pursuing these interests together vicariously through watching survival tv shows
- A common practice at dinner is to share about what we are learning through audiobooks or if we have read any interesting news articles that day.

The researcher mention above also did a study where couples were asked to describe their relationship using a scale of 7 circles.  At one end of the scale was two separate circles, the middle was two circles that overlap, and the opposite end was two circles draw virtually one top of the other.  It showed that those couples in fulfilling relationship picked the circles with the great overlap-- together they fill gaps.  Omni Vincit Amor.