Over the past several years I have lived the life of a single young female adult. One aspect of this lifestyle is having roommates. I have gotten to live with a bunch of great women and now all of a sudden I find myself married. This put an end of my "single" lifestyle which means I now have a permanent roommate who happens to be a guy. Thank goodness I wasn't completely caught off guard since I have had previous experience living with guys since I grew up with two brothers. However, it is still a little bit of an adjustment. In college I lived in an all-female dorm for 4 years. At times there was a lot of drama but also a lot of giggling and fun. Another summer I worked at a camp and share 1 room filled with bunk beds with 14 other gals-- lots of female bonding there as well. After so many years of living with ladies, here are the lessons and observations I have compiled from several weeks of living with Arthur.
1. Guys require much less time in the bathroom. Significantly less. Arthur can shower in less than a minute. By the time I get ready in the morning (and I like to think that I am fairly quick for a female) he has showered, dressed, gotten ready for work, and has breakfast on the table. They also have less bathroom stuff. I put my stuff in a drawer and 2 shelves of the bathroom. I worried about him having enough storage for his bathroom stuff. I didn't realize that the few items he had on the counter were all he had.
2. Guys require more food. Arthur has been amazed by my portion sizes and I have been amazed by the amounts he can consume without ill effects. While we were dating I once prepared him lunch of a can of soup. That was it. It would have been a very satisfactory meal for my roommate and I but I don't think it made a dent in his hunger. I think I have now figured out how to set enough on the table to satisfy his hunger (at least that is what he is telling me but we are newly married still so he may not be completely honest about my cooking yet.)
3. Guys like to drive. This has been wonderful. He opens the door for me, gets in, and then whisks me off to our destination. It could be that he likes driving his car so much he likes to hog it. I appreciate it since I am not a huge fan of driving and I can also take a nap. My job is co-pilot. I provide snacks, entertainment, and navigation skills. It works best for both of us.
4. Guys respond well when requests are preceded with a kiss. This was a trick Arthur taught me early and it has worked well. Anytime I give directions or ask for something (basically when I am bossy, usually this is in the kitchen) I need to give him a quick kiss first. He is becoming some of the best kitchen help around.
5. Don't make big plans on Thursday evenings. Sport Illustrated arrives on Thursdays. Often after dinner Arthur will grab the magazine and wander downstairs to his man-cave and be happy for hours. (In all honesty, I usually get to read Sports Illustrated at lunch on Thursdays at work so we don't have to fight over one copy.)
6. Guys get really excited about protecting their home from intruders. It has been interesting to see our different views on home security. I have lived in Kansas City or in random other places alone for the past several years. Anytime my mother calls I am always asked if the doors are locked, etc. So this is just a habit I have gotten into. Arthur doesn't worry so much about locking doors, especially before I started living with him. I think he would almost leave the door open with an invitation so he could beat up anyone who tried to enter his domain. I think he also takes great pride in investigating any unusual noises.
7. While guys are thrilled to be protectors, they also relish in the sneak attack. Only a few times in college did random people jump out of my clothes at me or did I get shot with a nerf gun while brushing my teeth. Now, though, I'm never sure if he is hiding behind the door or camouflaged under the comforter on the bed just waiting for me, unsuspecting prey, to wander by.
8. Guys have a certain large-ness. Arthur's clothes are much bigger than mine so they fill up the laundry basket faster than I would expect. He has a larger appetite (see #2). This requires frequent snacking as well. Guys take up more space. I'm not sure our bed is split 50-50 but at least I haven't been rolled over the edge yet. Arthur just doesn't fit in my car very well. He almost has to open the sunroof so there is space for his head. When we run together his stride is twice as long as mine so I have to take so many more steps (I suppose this is how the shorter girls I use to run against felt.) When we bought our wedding rings we had a hard time finding the correct sizes since my fingers are pretty small and Arthur has thick, "man-hands".
9. Guys are strong. I have come to realize that just because I'm sitting on the couch doesn't mean Arthur won't come along and decide that I need to be moved elsewhere, such as another seat on the couch, and there is not much I can do about it. Parents sometimes talk about how controlling their kids becomes a little more challenging when they grow and they can't pick them up or move them by physical force. Arthur doesn't have that problem. If I am being stubborn or a little ornery he just moves me out of the way. I think this is a very unfair advantage, however he may be able to get me to do what he wants with brute strength, I get him to do what I want with smooches (see #4), so it all works out.
10. Guys are a lot of fun to live with, or at least mine is. Everyday he surprises with something... breaking out in random snatches of song, dancing to rap music in the kitchen, making breakfast for me even when he has to leave for work early. While I'm sure there will continue to be more lessons to learn about living with this guy, it is never a bore. Somethings I just don't understand, but after all, Omnia Vincit Amor.
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